A few posts ago I mentioned that I wasn't prepared to start school again because I wasn't sure what I was doing yet with Oak Meadow/Serendipity/Waldorf-ish education. Today I realized that while that may be true, what I *really* am is SCARED! Scared that this new way of schooling won't be the healing, nurturing thing I hope it will be. Scared that it's just going to BOMB, and my relationship with my children will wind up deeper in the hole than it already is. We need to do school, and we need to bond more, and be gentle and fun together, and I so desperately want Oak Meadow/Waldorf-ish schooling to fulfill those needs, PLUS be a good education! We can't afford to do "school lite" anymore, esp. with my dyslexic oldest.
Aaaaaaaaaa!! THAT's why I don't want to start school up again. I'm terrified it'll fail, and then I won't know WHAT to do.
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5 comments:
You will know what to do because you will seek His face and He will speak to you. He is faithful to whisper to your heart as you search for His plans for you. Blessings and peace.
Feel the fear. And do it anyway.
And you know, Deb is so right. God will always offer his hand for you to hold.
I can completely empathise, and I'll be praying for you.
Amy, I hear you! I know ALL that you are feeling, and I am only doing first grade! Hugs.
You can do it!
What's more, you can change if it doesn't work out. You have options, you have time, and there is grace enough for all of our shortcomings.
May you find the perfect materials for you and your family. Hang in there!
~Luke
{Hugs} I woke up one morning recently with the words "total surrender" on my heart and mind. God was reminding me to trust Him--again--with the whole home education thing. I'm transitioning from Ambleside back to Sonlight (or a combination of both...not sure yet) and still waiting to see how it all settles out. I like to have the whole journey laid out before me, but He wants me to be open to changes for each child and every season of our lives. Sound familiar? ;-)
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